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Tragic's Wake
Break The Silence
Text
Enough already. Enough of the bullshit. I long ago stopped being myself. I gave my power, my life, to anyone who wanted it. I’m sick of surrendering myself to the fickle fancies of those who come into and out of my life. It is not a life, just a string of miseries without end. I’ve come to learn this now it is time to act on it. It is time to rebecome me. Rediscover who, what, and why I am. I knew it once, I felt it in my bones. I gave all that up for acceptance. I still do it. No more. I can’t keep living like this. It’s not living, it’s cutting small pieces out of my self and tossing them aside to make others happy.
I don’t know when I made this choice. No strike that, I do know. I know exactly when I made this decision. It was about 8 - 9 years ago. I did it for a woman. It was the biggest mistake I ever made. I became this spineless, whiny bitch. I gave up the ability to speak for myself, think for myself, act for myself. I became a pile of human waste. I don’t want that life anymore. I need a change. I need ME back.
If you don’t understand this, it’s ok. I’m writing this more as a statement of intent. This is mostly for me. If you do understand it. Maybe you made the same choices I did. Then you need to quit it too. It will only end in tears. You can trust me there. There is no future in living in the past and no present in living in surrender.
